Surveying spiritual techniques around the world is remarkably similar to the dating scene in New York. When I traveled across five continents, I examined a variety of techniques people use to get closer to their higher power. In creating my own spiritual path, I swiped left or right for the practices that worked for me. Never did I imagine the value of this type of discernment while dating in New York.
During my nomadic travel years, there were times when it was lonely being on the road. Forming any kind of lasting bond with someone was difficult, not least in a romantic sense, especially as I bounced from country to country, oftentimes in monastic environments that prohibited women.
While traveling, a relationship had an expiration concurrent with the date of either her or my own plane ticket, whichever came first. Now, settled in New York, each time I connect with someone I have a broader horizon than before.
There are many different ways to connect with singles in the city. Meeting in real life at a yoga class, coffee shop or on the high line has its advantages, though my shyness often prevents me from speaking up. I complement the old-school methods with dating apps – an easy way to have a coffee date to see if there’s a spark.
As a recovering nomad, the difference now is that when I meet a nice lady, if only for a coffee or a walk, the romantic me comes out to play. Being stationary gives me a license to dream – about a trip in a few months, plans to do something on the mid-term horizon, or growing old together, happily-ever-after – something difficult to do when I was in travel mode.
For now, I continue to meet people and enjoy the conversations, keeping my eyes open for a special relationship, knowing that the best things always seem to appear at the right time.
Are you single and have recently moved to a new city? How have you found the adjustment?
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